Friday, December 28, 2012


After the grand purge that was last night's blog post I cried a while, chatted with a few friends on FB about my Dad, fought a RAGING sinus headache, cried some more, and then took the hottest shower possible at 1am.  After some decongestants I went to bed around 2am and really didn't sleep. My head was pounding, my left eye felt like it was about to shoot out of my face... No real sleep. 

Lupe left at about 6:30 and I got up for more decongestants and a pain killer (Advil) and finally slept. Til Noon! Man, I woke up feeling rested, but drained. You know that feeling after you have had a real crying jag...  so I took it easy today.  I took out the trash, drank some coffee, read a bit, and generally was mellow.  The weather was blah and it suited me fine to just stay in my jammies for a few hours.

Blogging last night was really a good move. Cathartic. Cleansing. Refreshing.

Today I got my dissertation introduction back from my committee chair. It was good. He had a lot of comments/suggestions and I feel like I have some direction.  Getting started is the HARDEST part. It truly is. i have a lot of work ahead of me, but I feel like a plan is in place now and I am not alone, not really.  I chose my advisor/chair well.  He is a good fit for not only my topic, but for the way I work.  He is very efficient and will keep me on track.

So that was good thing #1 today. 

#2 - I stuck with my decision to go to yoga even though I was not feeling it.  I HAD to go to Arlington to pick up our Urban Acres produce share (#3) by 5:30 and yoga began at 5:45pm.  No excuse not to go.

The produce is GORGEOUS! and I have to try making kale chips, daikon pickles, and kohlrabi slaw (kohl slaw) this week.

Urban Acres - half share - Back up off my Honeycrisps!
So yoga. This was a new class for me. I have not been to the Friday night Dharma Gentle.  So it was new. The instructor was new to me. I was ok going in. She was lovely, talked to me before class about my yoga level, any injuries, needs etc.  And I was glad to be able to say that I knew adaptive poses for the ones I cannot fully do yet. The class was challenging but good.  There were two distinct times I found myself thinking, "ugh, if my belly wasn't so big I could reach... If I wasn't so fat I could..."

BUT (and I am proud of this) I just pushed those thoughts away. I told myself I was just beginning. I told myself that it didn't matter that I was the fattest person in the room, can't do a plank, have to do an adaptive Cat-Cow, have to do a Wall Dog, and that I have to use a strap to hug my knees to my chest (well, as close to my chest as possible at this point).  I am just starting this journey and it is OK to do what I can do in the moment.  And you know what? It was. 

My upper back and my legs are hella sore! HA!  AND I LIKE IT!  I have a Hatha Gentle class at 10:30 tomorrow and I am really looking forward to it. :D

I came home, had some yummy Turkey Divan Noodle casserole and went to the bookstore with my love.  a good night, indeed!

Let's keep this path, shall we?

Tomorrow I have to pick up an order of stuff from Lane Bryant - I think I will peruse their exercise wear, I need warmer things for the studio. I have yoga at 10:30am and need a few groceries. 

I think I will weigh in the morning. No matter the number, it will be OK. It is only the starting point, after all.

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